Our relationship with each other defines our health. Since it plays a pivotal role in shaping our lives it is the crux and backbone of happiness quotient. In a marriage, the consequent happiness is a result of relationships between man and wife. Following the rules of marriage is a very effortful task and requires equal amount of efforts from ends.
A healthy relationship is a complex and mysterious phenomenon between the two. In a marriage two people create a relationship and in turn the relation creates the two. When the two come closer there is intimacy and love for each other. The relationship is never one sided. Love should grow in both hearts simultaneously and should foster respect towards one another.
A marriage is like a tender plant. Nourishment through love, care, understanding is as vital as sunlight and water to the new plant. Just as the plant grows beautifully, the marriage lasts longer and grows every day into a strong and healthy relationship. Just as a plant faces rough climatic conditions and refuses to die out, similarly a healthy relationship should not be shunned down by quarrels, conflicts, anger, misjudgments and misunderstanding, doubts etc. These tough times can be taken as challenges to grow into a ripe fruit or a healthy relation. The strength of the marriage depends on the way of coping hard times. The deeper is the love the sooner they will emerge out of the conflict. With confidence in yourself and faith in the other you can face problems fare and square in a non-defensive manner, which will bring you closer to one another.
Communication- the key to Intimacy
Very often miscommunication lead to grudges and later to complaints, which give birth to dissatisfaction. Often not knowing what the other person wants from his/her spouse the two land up in a thick soup ending into a sea of trouble. Attitudes towards one another take a different turn if they are not very clear what they want from one another. A relationship marked with open communication is a breeding ground for intimacy and mutual understanding. A communication that is sincere, open and sympathetic is bound to lead to communion and union. Positive vibes also help in understanding one another. Often non-verbal relationships are more important than verbal ones. Gestures, facial expressions, action or simply silence are all part of non-verbal communication. Holding hands while watching a movie, smiling in admiration, giving a gentle touch while the spouse is in despair or eyes sparking with enthusiasm are all signs of positive non-verbal communication.
Bad communication like arguments, shouts, abuses, criticism, accuse create a negative and hostile environment in the house. The accused feels dejected hence throws back the same negative feedback.
In verbal communication, the person should be able to understand what the other person is talking about. To understand this, spouse should have the same vibration level. If the understanding is unclear it can cause problems. Often when two people do not have the same level of understanding they start drifting apart. A misunderstanding in communication is the only ingredient required to destroy a relationship.
A conversation needs the right quality of words input with the right feelings and attitiudes. If there is a mismatch, communication level gets unbalanced.
Criticism ? A destructive Force
Simply bragging or self-praise lays the grave for a marital life. Accepting the spouse in his/her condition is the right way to approach towards a healthy relationship. Constant criticism could lead to incontinence and late on death of self-esteem. This could create barriers in a marriage. Long-term relationships survive on the basis of respect towards one another with amount of appreciation and positive outlook. A way of attitude is all that matters for making matrimony more alive. Open conversation should be there to understand and accept the people in their natural forms. Two people sleeping on the same bed are like strangers meeting for the first rime if they do not open their hearts out and give their hands forward to a happy marital odyssey.
